Using Bees To Effect Vengeance

I get to be as self-indulgent as I want without wasting anyone's time. Guilt-free solipsism -- excellent!

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Email the Proprietor

Thursday, December 20, 2001
 
If you're going to make cereal available to your employees on Thursdays by 9:30am each week, why would you buy three boxes of cereal but not buy milk or, for that matter, plastic cereal bowls? And only make the cereal available at 10:30, by which time some of your employees are gnawing on cubicle decor for sustenance, and others have already gone ahead and switched firmly into lunch mode and no longer have any interest in the cereal?

Indeed, why would you force your employees to pour Frosted Mini Wheats into a small plastic cup, almost drive them to the indignity of topping it with the contents of multiple half-and-half containers before they serendipitously discover a small milk carton of dubious provenance cowering in the back of the fridge, at which time they pour that over the aforementioned Mini Wheats and in attempting to distribute the milk somewhat evenly across the surface area of said Wheats with a pathetic excuse for a spoon, almost cause the cereal to eject itself from the cup (no fault of the cup -- after all, it is not designed for this purpose) all over the floor and your employees' clothes?

Perhaps because they know -- they *know* -- that Frosted Mini Wheats are actually quite delicious, even at 10:45am.

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