Using Bees To Effect Vengeance

I get to be as self-indulgent as I want without wasting anyone's time. Guilt-free solipsism -- excellent!

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Tuesday, April 30, 2002
 
Ladies Night Transcript -- another doozy from Mighty Girl's Maggie. Beware: frank slumber-partyesque discussion lies behind that link.

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Sunday, April 28, 2002

Friday, April 26, 2002
 
I did lots of homework when I bought our DVD player, and one of the things I looked at was whether it was capable of playing DVDs from regions other than the US. I wasted a great deal of my former employer's time researching that, but now all that work has paid off, because:

The Young Ones is coming out on DVD.

(it will work, right? PAL and NTSC don't matter for DVDs, right? I can buy a British DVD and as long as my player is multi-region it will work, right? Please email me if you have insight into this important issue. Cheers.)

Sonnet and I hung around outside the Bowery Ballroom for 2 hours last night, but it was worth it -- we got into the sold-out Wilco show and they were transcendent. Buy the new record, people, it's as good as everyone says.

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Wednesday, April 24, 2002
 
MyBunnies.com -- Miriam owns 25 rabbits, and they've got one webpage each, bless 'em.

I liked the looks of Cocoa, Peter The Lop, and Clyde, but Snugglebunny and SweetPea were frankly rather scary. And the less said about Big Mama, the better...I will need to sleep with the light on for a few days.

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Sunday, April 21, 2002
 
OK, one more MP3 -- I can't resist. Soul Chills, Part 1, by DeDe Soul And The Spidels -- check out that bass playing! Dearie me.

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Saturday, April 20, 2002
 
Can't sleep. Brain wired on Claritin-D and too bloody hot, despite an almighty thunderstorm this evening. So, here's an account of my attempt to get into an industry-only Elvis Costello gig at the luscious Bowery Ballroom, as emailed to Danielle earlier today....

"I met my friend Adam and his friend Mike down there...we got in the line sans wristbands, passes, what have you, and tried to figure out a plan. We came up with three --

1) I bought tickets on the Island website on Monday and they should be waiting inside

2) I am a label rep for John Mayer, the opening act

3) I work for Island -- whaddya mean I'm not on the list

Adam chose #1, Mike and I were more comfortable with #2. Adam went ahead in the line to make it all less suspicious. Five minutes later, Adam heads back to us shaking his head. He tried it, they said "If you're not on the list, we can't let you in". He got in line with us to try #2 -- although the girl at the door had looked straight at him, they were letting the punters in a different door than the industry people, so it seemed safe. Just as we approach the door, they said "Next few people, go the other door please" -- so he had to drop out and head further back the line to avoid recognition.

Mike and I head downstairs, credit card in hand. "We bought tickets on the site on Monday", I said nonchalantly and presented the card. "We don't have you here.". "What? Can you look again" "Sorry, you're not on here. You got them on the Costello site?" "Yes, on Monday. Can we pay cash or something?" "No, this is a private event, we're not selling tickets. If you're not on the list, you can't get in". This last was the large bouncer hovering near the girl at the door. "Are there other lists we might mistakenly be on?" She looks..."No, not here. It looks like your card was never charged. You'll have to go back upstairs."

We trundle back up, dejectedly. When we get up there, Adam comes over, having failed in his attempt to execute plan #3. We stood around for 10 or 15 minutes, my hay fever causing me no end of trouble. I was ready to split, when we heard a Bowery employee say to another, "So-and-so says we can start selling tickets." Straight into the small line, and we're in.

Brilliant.

John Mayer set new standards for crap. His songs were boring, most of his lyrics were about how much he treasured his woman's body, and he made the most hilariously wanky faces when soloing. Dreadful. Of course, the obligatory coterie of blond co-eds stood at the front, staring adoringly at him, mouthing the words, and generally attempting to communicate their eagerness to bestow copious blowjobs upon him.

Elvis was good. The band didn't seem too tight except on the faster numbers like Dust, Lipstick Vogue, Doll Revolution, Hope You're Happy Now, Pump It Up -- in fact, they definitely got better throughout the set.
Waiting For The End Of The World was an unqualified thrill, Man Out Of Time sounded gorgeous even though Steve was inaudible for most of it (there were quite a few problems with the mix -- Elvis seemed to blame much of them on the roadies) -- and the way he waited for the industry scum to shut up before finishing I Want You was pretty spine-tingling. Didn't play Daddy Can I Turn This, which was a disappointment, and Alison was tossed off carelessly (take more care with your tossing, Declan), but we were as close as this to Elvis and rock band in fine fettle and it was a grand night.

Davey Faragher is a champ...he played terrifically. And Steve was doing some beautiful stuff during Episode Of Blonde. Pete was as invigorating as usual - a rapid fire drum fill 10 seconds into WFTEOTW upped the energy *immediately*...he's such a god.

Don't really have time to get into more detail, but you will enjoy yourselves, no doubt about that."

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Wednesday, April 17, 2002
 
Claritin-D
Why has thou forsaken me?
Have I displeased thee?

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Tuesday, April 16, 2002
 
A bunch of different Weezer covers, including the UC Berkeley Marching Band covering Pink Triangle and -- oh yes -- The Olson Twins covering Island In The Sun (disappointingly, they don't appear to be on the song -- perhaps it was just recorded for their movie).

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Being Geddy Lee -- in which one man synchs the dialogue in Being John Malkovich with the music and musings of the band Rush.

" I decided that I would listen to every interview of Rush I had (in both audio and video form) and pick out pieces of dialogue to incorporate into this project. Having approximately 75-100 hours worth of material, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy…but nothing worthwhile in life ever is."

Wow.

Next they'll be saying that 2112 syncs up perfectly with Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory or something. Oh, wait...

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Monday, April 15, 2002
 
Let's update the MP3 Of The Time Increment, shall we?

Hmmm. Let's see. Ah yes:

Gus "The Groove" Lewis: Let The Groove Move You

First of all, his name is Gus -- a good omen for a soul singer. Second of all, this is a fearsomely funky track -- fat fat drums, spot-on Raelettes/Sweet Inspirations-style backing vocals, all manner of guttural grunting, the words "Sock it to 'em, Leroy" featured prominently...need I belabor the point?

How did I come across this slice of sweat-soaked Southern soul, you ask? It's all thanks to Mr. Fine Wine ("Cake...and fine wine" -- quick, name that movie), the DJ who transmits rare soul and funk 45s across the tri-state area from 7-8pm Friday evenings on WFMU. I'm telling you -- one jaw-dropping tune after another. Shame you'll have to move to New York to hear it.......aha, tricked you!! WFMU archives all the shows in RealAudio format for your listening enjoyment. And they even keep playlists on file, to aid the furious Audiogalactic surfing which will undoubtedly transpire shortly after you tune in. Ooh, you really are a lucky bastard, aren't you?

P.S -- When you're finished goggling at the aforementioned bounty, peep this. [Goes slackjawed] God bless these trainspotters. I think my next bad habit will be collecting '60s soul 45s.

P.P.S -- Oh, and here's a live MP3 of Belle And Sebastian having an impromptu go at "Oliver's Army".

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Wow, no health insurance + unappealing $600/mth COBRA coverage option + wife's numb fingertips and continuous shooting pain in arms = bad.

No health insurance + wife's numb fingertips and continuous shooting pain in arms + two weeks sans relief = something must be done. But still = bad.

Go to doctor anyway + reassuringly authoritative diagnosis + great sense of relief + free samples of prescribed anti-inflammatory + loads of Claritin-D samples for husband whose prescription has just run out = good. $150 out of pocket, well spent.

And you can sod your bloody COBRA.

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Wednesday, April 10, 2002
 
Bugger -- Costello at the Beacon Theatre three weeks after we move. No Austin date yet...c'mon EC, The Backyard, The Backyard...

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Sorry I've been AWOL for so long, kids. This whole unemployment thing really throws one off one's schedule. Some tidbits from the last week then:


  • Despite sporting the dreaded Verbing Proper Noun title construction, Kissing Jessica Stein was actually really really good. Very sharp dialogue, believable characters, and nice performances, particularly from Tovah Feldshuh. Recommended.



  • Roxanne Hale has a gig in NYC on Sunday, but be sure to check out her MP3s before going....



  • Another interesting wind power article, this time in The New Republic. Wind power has a lot of political hurdles to jump, but damn if it don't get me all polyanna-ish. The replacement of fossil fuels with renewable energy is such a tantalizing prospect (and such an enormous business opportunity).

    And finally, the big news: we're moving back to Austin. Yep. An intense couple of days saw the missus and I run through the scenarios and it soon became clear that our plans to move to Austin-or-somewhere-like-it in the next year or so had to be accelerated. Accelerated to June 1, to be precise. It will be enormously difficult to leave our amazing, amazing New York friends...but we've consoled ourselves with the thought that we'll certainly be coming to New York as frequently as possible...plus lots of them have Austin connections of their own, so that will help too. Fear not, though, gentle reader: Using Bees shall persist, like a dry cough that you desperately wish would melt into proper phlegm already so that you could get some satisfaction from clearing your throat.

    CDs near my desk today: all of them (hah!)


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  • Wednesday, April 03, 2002
     
    A great contribution from Lisa:

    Foretold day arrives
    Anticipation is worse
    Hey! Freedom-Hey dey!

    Hey dey indeed. This whole staying home thing isn't so bad. It's a gorgeous Park Slope spring morning, I had a bagel and a delicious cup of coffee from Ozzies, we're having lunch with Jeff in a while, I'm getting to spend lots of time with my wife, I'm no longer spinning my wheels in a job where I wasn't learning anything, and I'm listening to even more recently discovered Nick Drake outtakes while looking for another job. In the meantime, if anyone could use some smart, creative internet marketing strategy on a freelance basis, give me a shout (hey, you never know).

    And I've just received a haiku from Bekkah, acknowledged queen of the form:

    what do the boss know?
    cut off nose to spite their face
    chickens with no heads


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    Monday, April 01, 2002
     
    You know what might be the worst part about losing my job? I must have had 2 or 3 gigs worth of MP3s on that machine. Damn.

    By the way, it has been pointed out that my earlier haikus were not, in fact, strictly speaking, ipso facto, haikus at all, but a brand new, perhaps Japanese-inspired form of poetry that could easily be mistaken for haiku unless one were a true syllable-counter. However, Michelle has thoughtfully contributed a true haiku as an exemplar of the genre, to wit:

    The other shoe? Yea,
    but it did finally drop.
    Enter G 'n T

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    back from passover
    "hit the bricks, pal"; oy vey
    oh those bitter herbs

    if I stay insured
    and get decent severance
    then Dayenu

    and from Sonnet:

    Laid off by the man?
    Fuck all those motherfuckers.
    Steal office supplies.


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    Got laid off 20 minutes ago via phone. To be fair, when my boss gets back in the office this afternoon, I'll be meeting with her. Not a surprise, as those of you who've been subjected to my incessant rabbiting are well aware -- and not entirely unwelcome either. At the moment, I'm pretty much focused on tying up the loose ends, etc., but if you have an urge to contribute a topical haiku, I'll be sure to publish it when I have time.

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